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* Miss Chick Lit Beauty Pageant 2015 *









     Olivia Daly wiped a bead of perspiration from her brow. So much for the makeup she'd troweled on. Her stomach did somersaults worthy of an Olympic medal, at the thought of standing in front of thousands of people. But she was determined to be the focus of attention in a positive way for once. There was a first time for everything. The pageant winner would be jetting off on a trip for two, to the sun. A perfect honeymoon. Connor, her future husband, was in the crowd somewhere, with her boss, Gerry. She hopped over to the curtain and peered through. She could almost hear Gerry panting at the thought of so many scantily-clad girls. 
     Suddenly, she lost her balance. Despite clinging onto the curtain for support, she stumbled and fell onto the stage. The silence was deafening. There was only one thing for it: pretend it was planned. She crawled along the shiny floor, pausing to kick her legs behind her for effect. The costume may have been her downfall, literally, but it was her saving grace now.
I feel like a fool but as long as I pretend to swim, it'll be okay. They'll all think I'm clever!




     "That was quite an entrance." One of the judges stepped forward and thrust a microphone up Olivia's nose. "Tell us a bit about yourself."
     "Hi, my name is Olivia Daly, and I'm representing Shakespeare's home county of Warwickshire. I'm Miss Understood, and I'm a 26 year-old shop manager who adores pink. And my dog, Buddy. My dream is to one day find a cure for Choccochunky."
     "Chocochunky?" The judge's brow furrowed.
     "Yes. Eating chocolate makes you chunky. I'd love to find a way of taking out the calories." She beamed. "It would be as good for you as eating lettuce or raw carrots. But a lot tastier, obviously."
A murmer of approval echoed around the vast room, almost exclusively from the females.
     "That's an unusual costume, Olivia." The judge smiled. "A mermaid, hey? Is that what you'd wear to swim in?"
No, it's to make me look curvy, while covering my wobbly arse! 





     "Absolutely." She nodded. "If I lived near the ocean...and if I could actually swim, that is."
     "I see. So, what's the talent you're going to entertain us with?"
     "Juggling." Olivia took the three balls from the waiting assistant, and threw them in the air. One by one they fell in every direction, but her hands. She wiped clammy palms down her sequinned skirt, trying, but failing, to ignore the titters from the crowd.
     "Oh, dear," said the judge. "I bet you do it perfectly without a huge audience."
     "I've never tried juggling with balls," Olivia answered. "But I'm an expert at juggling credit cards. I thought as I juggled my finances so well, the balls would be a doddle."
The judge cleared his throat. "I see. Olivia, what would you do to make the world a happier place?"
     "Well, I'd start with Coventry. It was bombed in 1940 and all the Tudor buildings were lost, apart from one street. The city was rebuilt quickly in ugly concrete buildings."
     "So, you'd rebuild the city, back to its former black and white glory?" the judge asked.
     "Not quite." Olivia shook her head. "Tudor buildings are pretty, but all black and white is so boring, don't you think? I bet it was that stupid Henry VIII who brought in that rule. I'd bring in a new rule worldwide: every house would be painted at least partly in pink. I know a few men may object, they aren't all in touch with their feminine side. So, I suppose I'd let them off painting, as long as they had something pink outside."
     "Like what?" The judge grimaced.
     "Erm, well...maybe a pink pig statue. Or something."


     "Thank you, Olivia. You've been most entertaining. We'll see you later." Something in his expression told Olivia he wished this wasn't the case.
What does he know anyway? I thought it went amazingly well! Time for a drink, Olivia...you deserve it!



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You can be a beauty Queen too with this $100 gift card US/Canada winner
UK winner - £65 gift card for Lush Cosmetics
Australia winner - $125AUD for Mecca







In order to be entered, you need to answer the same interview question as Olivia:

What would you do to make the world a happier place?


Post your answer by clicking on the comment box at the end of this post, along with your email address. A winner will be chosen via random.org on Monday May 18th. You are free to enter the giveaway on not just this blog post, but also on each of the blogs participating in the pageant. That's nineteen chances to win! You will find the links to the other blogs below. 
Also, if you've enjoyed getting to know Olivia, the link to 'The OMG Test' can be found below too. Thank you for joining us to celebrate Chick Lit May. Enjoy the rest of the pageants!
Love Pippa X

The OMG Test




Miss Chick Lit Participant Links:

Laura Kenyon
Gina Henning
Tracie Banister
Cat Lavoie
Amy Gettinger
Celia Kennedy
Glynis Astie
Engy Albasel Neville
Tracy Krimmer
Cait Reynolds
Franky Brown
Monique McDonell
Colleen Oakes
Whitney Dineen
Maggie Le Page
Kathryn Biel
Rachel L. Hamm
Laura Chapman

36 comments:

  1. What a fun and clever way to approach this! I love it, and she really doesn't have any luck with balls :-)

    I'm not entering, but I would take the politics out of politics! That doesn't make any sense, does it? I'm tired of all the parties arguing back and forth. Everyone can come together and GET ALONG!

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    1. Thank you tkrimms :-)
      No, she has no luck with balls ;-)
      I agree totally, and yes, it does make sense! You should think about a career change...we need a politician like you! xxx

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  2. What an incredible post, Pippa! I really enjoyed it. :)

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  3. Replies
    1. That's fab Whitney! I was nervous, but we've all done well, haven't we? :-) xxx

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  4. I love your blog post and your answers are hysterically funny! Well done Pippa. xx

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    1. Ohh, thank you so much, Engy! :-) xxx

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    1. Are you going to get one, Gina? :-) xxx

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  6. I could get down with a pig statue. Loved the post!

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    1. Pig statue it is, Colleen! Thank you :-) xxx

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  7. Great blog, excellent entrance. She's my kind of gal. To make the world a better place, I would dip my wand in my magic bag and sprinkle everyone with the self-confidence dust that Olivia has!

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  8. Bethany Clark
    bethanyclark2014@gmail.com

    To make the world a better place, I would concentrate my efforts on helping children get the best start that they can, they are the future!

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  9. I chuckled all the way through this post. Olivia is quite a character! Choccochunky - hee! I think that word should be added to the dictionary. And I love the mermaid costume idea! Olivia would get along well with Willa as they both have a fondness for pink.

    Great job, Pippa!

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    1. Ha ha! Olivia and Willa all the way! Lol Tracie :-)
      Thank you! xxx

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  10. Awesome post! I totally support Olivia's dream! (In fact, it might now be MY dream as well! lol)

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  11. To make the world a happier place
    I would turn anything nasty or unpleasant into calorie free chocolate and encourage people to join me in eating my way to happiness

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    1. Anonymous - you think like Olivia! :-) xxx

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  12. What would I do to make the world a happier place? Ideally, I would have superpowers that would help me fix all environmental destruction/issues, create a limitless supply of food, water, shelter, etc. My ideal world would be a place where money did not exist and people were motivated by their passions. (Also just got myself a copy of The OMG Test, sounds like a great read!)

    -Arielle
    Lifewithariellejoy@gmail.com

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    1. Arielle, thank you so much!
      I think a world where money did not exist would be fantastic! xxx

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  13. I help every animal I can to make the world a happier place for me.
    2dogs5catscrew@att.net

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    1. Amy, I hate to hear about animals who are abused and abandoned. Very upsetting. I'd want to help them all too xxx

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  14. I would stop all the wars!

    groogruxking40 @ gmail dot com

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    1. Steve, I wish this could happen. I'm sad about the world we're living in right now, and there seems to be no end to the hatred xxx

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  15. I would make the world a better place by being kind to everyone I meet.

    walkingcorpse11@hotmail.com

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    Replies
    1. That's always a good thing Jessica! Sometimes easier said than done, we're all human. But I do try. A kind word can make someone's day xxx

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  16. This will sounds kinda stupid but I think scent could make the world a better place. I'd love to have a place to go like an art gallery but with different smells - floyddg@hotmail.com

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    1. Danielle, that's not stupid! I love scent too. In fact, I'm addicted to perfume :-) xxx

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  17. teach people how to read

    bn100candg at hotmail dot com

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    1. That's a good one, bn100. That's what Olivia wants to do in the book! xxx

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  18. All collection awesome.Thanks for blogger..very nice web...
    girls pageant

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Texas Divas :-)
      Love Pippa x

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